steepwithdead | Folkmore

[Well, that's convenient as all heck.]

I know the one. I'll see you tomorrow morning then! Thank you.

You're very welcome. Oh, and if you are averse to snacks and tea at the meeting, do let me know.

[Trying to avoid another Sumire situation. He never did find out why she was so horrified by it, but if asking first will make people more at ease, it's no problem on his part.]

I would say I'm definitely NOT averse if that helps.

[Maybe therapy will be more palatable with snacks. WHO KNOWS.]

Then snacks will be had.

See you tomorrow.

[WELP this means she will indeed be trundling up to the door of this impressive-looking house the next day after breakfast and. Probably knocking a little more timidly than she's used to because he seems nice and this is weird and out of the norm for her okok.]

[The door opens after a handful of seconds, and there's Caduceus in a long-flowing pastel robe and a bright smile.]

Good morning! Give me just a moment, I'll grab the tray and we can head upstairs. Hold the door for me, would you?

[He vanishes briefly to fetch the promised snacks from the kitchen, returning soon with a tray, holding a teapot, some mugs and fixings, and a bowl of honey biscuits that smell fresh and delicious.]

Thank you, that's a big help. This way, to the tower. You're April, yeah? Nice to meet you.

[Come, come! Off to the side is and open-bottom tower with a little pool of water (like a stone jacuzzi, with the bubbles off) and stairs leading up to the roof.]

[Oh my god, freshly baked snacks at that. Clearly therapy is for winners. At least to begin with. Maybe. But yes, she holds the door obligingly with a smile that's a little more certain when he's so welcoming and she follows in his wake.]

That's me. Nice to meet you too! In the flesh, anyway. We spoke once before a while ago.

[First Class Counselling, that's the name of the game. (Or he has nothing to do otherwise so he just bakes and gardens. It's probably both, he likes to be a good host.)]

I remember! I was telling you about this place, if I recall.

[Up the stairs they go! The roof of the tower (and the rest of the mansion, besides) is a thriving paradise of plants, flowers, and fauna of all sorts, taking over the whole surface in a weirdly organized chaos. He leads them over to the base of the tree, setting the tray down on a little stool and sitting in the grass.]

You sure were. [She's not usually one for the whole one with nature thing (witness: girl who probably spends all the time in a car on a phone) but she can still appreciate how beautiful this is. Suits him, she thinks. For as little as she knows about the guy. Barry would probably love it up here too.]

Looks like a great investment of Lore to me.

I thought so. I don't need much, really, but it was nice to have something familiar here.

[It sure does suit him, and Barry sure did appreciate it! Most people do, but he's not fussed if they don't.

Once they're settled, he pours them each some tea. There's fixing if she likes it, though he takes it plain; it's a subtly herbal fruit blend, nothing too robust, but good for the throat.]

[April doesn't drink a huge amount of tea, but that's not to say she doesn't like it, and she's a little nervous about upcoming talks. Not the talking in specific, at least-- but she takes a sip with a brief smile and a thank you, and then frankly admits it.]

I'm not sure exactly how this works. Do I just, uh... do you ask questions or...?

Hmm... well, there is no singular method that works with everyone. But those who need counselling usually have something they need to talk about, so if they're able to, I like to let them speak, rather than me unknowingly guiding them nowhere. However, if you have any questions, at any time, I'm happy to answer you.

[He doesn't know her well, and it can take a bit of time to learn the limits and preferences of those who come to him for help. First round tends to be a little slower, as they feel each other out.]

...'kay... uh.

[It isn't precisely hesitance to talk about it. It's having no real clue where to start. But after dithering about it, she just goes with the blunt option. She's gonna do this shit feet first.]

Okay. So I got here like months after everyone else in my family, and when I got here, one of them had already lost an arm. And the other two have both died in the past six months. One accidentally and one for incredibly questionable and immoral choices. I'm, uh, not... doing so well, I guess?

[She's been mad for too many weeks straight at this point.]

[A good chunk of that is familiar to him - he's been hearing these stories for about a year now, after all, plus whatever Rue opts to share from their perspective - so his reaction is gently lifted brows and a thoughtful hum.]

I can hardly imagine anyone who wouldn't struggle with all of that compounding on one another. Is the helplessness of it getting to you?

[Obvious question is obvious, but you gotta chip away at these things.]

[SQUINT.]

Huh. You said that in way less words.

[So yes.]

That happens sometimes. [Practice, mostly, but also decent guesswork.

They're not here for his words, though.] Helplessness is a natural side effect. What else have you been feeling?

Uh... [She winces a little. Not because she thinks she's not justified, but it feels different talking to like an adult mostly-stranger who already feels worlds more mature than anyone else she speaks to.]

Lotta anger. Both at the stupidity and the... uh, the helplessness, I guess.

The stupidity?

[They can circle back, but that part sticks out the most right now.]

[She makes a small noise, part frustration and where to start.]

There's no point throwin' your life away in an attempt to save everyone else, not when there's like... dozens of other choices. Everyone else sure doesn't want that. And after the fact they're all like 'oh, ha, whoops' and unrepentant and you know they'd do it again if they thought they had to.

Mm... the persistence of it does make it that much worse. It's one thing to make a choice, suffer the consequences, and regret it. But if one makes the same choice over and over, or those around you know you'd do it again, well. That can be infuriating.

[Yes, her anger is very understandable.]

Sacrifice like that... it's not without merit, not entirely. I cannot lie to you and say there is no situation where it's either warranted or the only option. But many become trapped by it: when the thought comes to mind, and you can see a path towards some kind of victory, it's hard to backtrack and look for another way. You think: I have a solution. It has a high chance of success. It would be selfish to keep looking. The trap is a room with a door and you've locked yourself in.

I get it. I do get that. [There's been a lot of trying to make herself less upset about Leo's sacrifice play back home, because honestly they probably didn't have any other real choice--but it still stings, and everyone plays the what if game. But for that to go on to be the foundation that everyone else is apparently running with...]

In Leo's case, I was also proud...? But really kind of-- it's still heart breaking it came to that. And I'm okay with that. I made my peace. [She's going on faith that Casey has probably talked about Leo at length, to be honest, but she does track Cad's face for signs of confusion. She can explain further if she has to, she just doesn't really want to.]

Raph's death was an accident, but he decided to sit on that knowledge and not tell anyone, for all the good that did him. And Donnie...

[...]

...you heard about the kidnappings and stuff, right?

[Caduceus doesn't show any indication of surprise or disturbance at her words; safe to say the topic of Leo, or his sacrifice, or both, has come up before. April can consider herself spared from trying to explain unless she wants to discuss her own feelings on the matter.

As for Donnie...]

Mm... yes, I'm aware. Casey missed one of our meetings, and when he came back he had quite a lot to say. [He sips at his tea, then adds meaningfully,] He gave me permission to discuss whatever I felt was relevant, with you.

[It's very obvious that April has a lot of trust; it's also important for April herself to know that he doesn't go around spilling the tea (hah) about these meetings without express permission first.]

I'm not privy to the manner of his passing. [Casey didn't know that part.] But it sounds as if he felt pushed into a singular solution of his own, and wasn't able to budge from it or seek help.

[Oh, Casey said that, huh? ~~How convenient~~ It's useful to hear, though she doesn't want to cross the therapy streams if she can help it, so she just crooks a small smile of appreciation before she lets it fall.]

You know what's fun? I don't know how he died either. He just said he messed up. I'm guessin' from what Raph said it was some kinda backlash from his... portal or whatever, but I don't know. I just woke up and he was dead. [She pauses to bite into one of those honey biscuits with perhaps more gusto than necessary, but.]

...you're right, though. But that's kind of a pattern lately. Everyone with their own singular solutions.

[Another thoughtful hum. Sometimes not knowing is a blessing. Sometimes it makes things more difficult to get over. It's a conundrum.]

In your opinion, how has he been since it happened? Do you think he may be more willing to work together and communicate with you and your family, or is this behaviour likely to continue? It's alright if you don't know.

[Someone showing the capacity to learn from their mistakes can go a long way to alleviating the fear and anger of bad behaviour. Of course, it requires action, not just empty words, but it's a start.]

[She gives it some due thought while she finishes her biscuit, though she's more or less certain of her answer already--just running it through her own mind first. And not speaking with her mouth full, it's polite.]

He says he's sorry. And he is, but it's about the wrong thing. Not goin' behind our backs to put himself at risk. Not kidnapping people. He's sorry that it failed and he couldn't get us home.

So in my opinion, he feels humbled and like he messed up-- again, on the wrong thing-- and will play nice for a long while now, but it's because he knows we're upset and because he feels bad that he failed. So... I dunno. I hope dyin' was enough of a shock, but I can see him doin' something equally boneheaded again eventually.

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