steepwithdead | Folkmore

You'll probably unfortunately keep running into it. It's a lot easier to hate yourself than love yourself. [He's speaking from experience, though he doesn't get into it.]

It'll keep me from throttling him or somehow making this worse.

Unfortunate is the word.

[Ah, well. He's working on it, one suffering soul at a time.]

Throttling him definitely will not help.

It'd make me feel better. [He grumps back vaguely.] What about my mental health, huh?

[He's not being particularly serious.]

You've been taking care of your mental health in a less violent way, if I recall.

[You literally saw him for therapy?]

Sounds fake. Time to self-destruct, forever.

[Bro, you are LIVING!!! in his house!!

Grumping melodrama aside, Leonardo just sighs.] Never realized how much I sanctified the stupid dumdum until he was alive again.

[The disrespect!!]

Grief has a tendency to colour one's memories, make them rosy and clean. It's why you rarely hear people say negative things at funerals.

[And boy has he ever seen a ton of funerals. Most of them have the same vibe. Whoever the person was in life, in death, there were no evil deeds to speak of.]

[Leonardo can't stop himself from sighing openly at that.] It's sure... a hard lesson, re-learning he's still a pain in the ass.

Siblings always are. You have to re-learn how to balance it, too.

[That comes neither easy nor quickly. It's part of the growing pains.]

And that means both of you.

I got too used to Mikey's level of being a pain in the ass. All his mystic guru-esq sayings... [He answers with a weak laugh.] Gotta get used to Donnie's bullshit again.

To him... we didn't lose that time. I spent years apart, and it hasn't been like that for him.

That does complicate things. How long was it?

[He didn't start seeing Casey for counselling until a while after his arrival, so the time difference could be different from what he recalls.]

There was a two year gap on my side of things. [He answers easily enough.] I need to figure out how to stop bringing it up and... letting it color things.

You can stop bringing it up, but the second part is impossible. Your world has changed, the colours shifted. They'll never be as they were before. What you need is to work together to find a new future together, in those colours.

[He turns the thought over in his mind, trying to commit that to memory.] It feels easier said than done. I want him to know I love him and missed him, but, it doesn't always-

[He cuts off the thought.] Work together to find a new future, okay. I can do that. We can do that.

[Caduceus pauses to let him finish, but at the cut-off, he makes a musing noise.]

It will be slow-going. Have faith in him, and yourself, but be patient. Slowly, Leo.

I'm going to try. [He means it, even if a bitter thought slips out.] I just need him to stop tanking his only relationships first. All he has is us and he's running.

He isn't ready to stop running yet. It's part of the process.

If I break his ankles, it might help. [He grumps back with a roll of his eyes at the thought of his twin.] I just... gotta be patient.

I can do patience. I've been so patient already.

Spoken like a man really feeling the patience.

[Or a man living on the edge of a breakdown.]

It's alright to need to vent. It can help you keep control in other aspects of your life, when it really counts.

[Why not both??]

You know me, an infinite well of patience.

Yeah, I know, all I can even do right now is vent. Vent and check on Casey given all of this is probably worse for him.

Don't let yourself focus on who has it worse. [That's a trap.] If his biggest issue is your opinions on his health, would you be able to spend time with him without bringing it up?

[Even with his frustration, Leonardo takes a moment to take a breath and think things over.] Yes, I think I could. It would just take a little time for me to calm down.

I imagine he's in the same situation. Take that time, and maybe broach the subject after a while. At least a few days.

[If not more. Considering how volatile the fight was, with Leo coming back bloodied? Yeah, might need extra time to cool down from that.]

[He really wants to stay angry, but, is aware it's not going to help. After Casey reaches out to him, the turtle will realize how badly he meddled.] I'll probably give it a week or two. We need a cool down period. Not like we were talking before this anyway.

Sounds like you've got a plan, then. Wait a week, see how you feel at the end of it. If you're not ready, one more.

[One or two weeks is a pretty good timeline. Best not to come in too hot, or wait too long.]

Hopefully, it doesn't turn into any longer. I miss him. Even if he's... the worlds biggest idiot.

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